{"id":9458,"date":"2022-01-10T20:17:09","date_gmt":"2022-01-10T07:17:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.frot.co.nz\/design\/?p=9458"},"modified":"2022-05-02T19:28:17","modified_gmt":"2022-05-02T07:28:17","slug":"cycle-services-the-newsletters","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.frot.co.nz\/design\/frot-design\/cycle-services-the-newsletters\/","title":{"rendered":"CYCLE SERVICES – THE NEWSLETTERS"},"content":{"rendered":"

GIVE ME CYCLE SERVICES NEWSLETTERS!<\/strong><\/span><\/h1>\n\n\n\n
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The original Cycle Services Newsletters are all still online HERE<\/a> – but this is going to be one huge blog post with the whole lot,\u00a0 just because modern searching tends to favour having a truckload of stuff on one webpage, and we don’t give a toss about bandwidth anymore, so why not?<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

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FEBRUARY 1993<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

NEWSLETTER #1<\/span><\/b><\/p>\n

Starting with this one, we are planning to bring out a newsletter each month. We intend having information about upcoming races, good rides, technical and product reviews, and any other entertaining stuff. If you have anything that would be good for the next newsletter please drop it in. (Especially cycling cartoons and bizarre stories).<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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OUR SECOND ANNIVERSARY<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/h3>\n

Cycle Services has now been open for two years (we opened 1 Feb 1991). This year we were thinking of moving into the vacant Smith City showroom and having 4000 new bikes on display, but our customers have convinced us to stay small, and also we didn\u2019t want to put Midnight Espresso out of business by moving all their clientele away. To all our regular customers who keep coming back \u2013 Thanks heaps and keep on destroying those bikes.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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<\/a>THE WORD FROM CUBA STREET<\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/u><\/p>\n

Hot word action from Cycle Services:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Going off: <\/strong><\/u>good, works well, looks good<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“That $8000 Marin Team Titanium FRS goes off !”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Hot action: <\/strong><\/u>an especially going off example of some kind of activity<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“Hot downhill crash action !”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Tosser<\/strong><\/u>: Not going off dude who is not capable of any hot action<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“Look, that tosser on the Raleigh 20 just fell off in the gutter”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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<\/a>RIDER PROFILE<\/span><\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

The first in a series of rider profiles on customers who “Live to Ride” \u2013 what makes the hardcore rider tick ? Here is psychological insight to help budding “hell riders” go from tossing to thrashing:<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Name :<\/strong><\/u> Craig Anderson<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Nickname :<\/u> Bugle<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Suburb :<\/strong><\/u> Red Light Central (Marion St), Wellington<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Occupation:<\/strong><\/u>Roadie (Musical) Age :<\/u>23<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Bike :<\/strong><\/u> Diamondback (Well, the frame is)<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Components :<\/strong><\/u> Shimano, Mavic, Araya, Selle Italia, Richley, Panaracer, Mt Zefal, Gaffer Tape<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Extras :<\/strong><\/u> J bars, pump, bottles, Custom “Wheels” Shoulder Strap<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Most awesome ride\/race : <\/strong><\/u>Belmont Reserve, Johnson\u2019s Hill, The ELEVATOR<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Other favourite rides :<\/strong><\/u>Mt Climie, Wrights Hill short track, Eastbourne hills<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Favourite Food :<\/strong><\/u> Pasta, powerbars, espresso, tequila, chicken, spuds, fish<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Favourite Music:<\/strong><\/u>Pixies, Tom Waits, Bad Brains, Suicidal Tendencies or anything else decidedly alternative, jazz hip hop x-over<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Favourite Films:<\/strong><\/span><\/u><\/p>\n

Vampire\u2019s Kiss, Akira, anything by Jim Jarmusch, Brazil, Ford Fairlane, The Cook The Thief<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

His Wife and Her Lover<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Favourite Books\/Mags:<\/strong><\/u> Sci Fi, anything with MTB or Naked Women, Gary Larsen<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Ambitions\/Aspirations : <\/strong><\/u>Pay my acc at Cycle Services, Ride to the top of Mt Climie without stopping more than once, Get rich, Die spectacularly<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Hot Comment Action:<\/strong><\/u> Live to eat. Just cause you\u2019re not paranoid, don\u2019t mean we\u2019re not after U. Don\u2019t eat shellfish. Team Nihilist \u2013 one for one, one for one. No Hope, No Fear<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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HELLRIDE OF THE MONTH<\/strong><\/span><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

Belmont Trig to Korokoro, via Baked Beans Bend<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

To make this ride more epic, we chose a day with torrential rain and a ripping southerly. Starting at Stratton St carpark (where we left a car and trailer) we rode at a grovelly but determined pace up to Belmont Trig, where the business could begin. The long wet grass meant there were some going off crashes right from the outset, as complete brake failure lead to out of control careering down the steep bits, and frequently the only way to slow down was to slam into some bushes.<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The track was a bit overgrown, but all rideable, although a couple of bits, like the tight tree root technical section near the top, we didn\u2019t manage to ride without hitting a few trees, and crashing a bit. <\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Once past the Baked Beans Bend the track is flatter but all gradual downhill. Some major drops down into the Korokoro stream beside the narrow track made for exciting near misses, until one of us clipped the bank and fell off a 30 foot vertical drop upside down. Fortunately he lived. Note: Extra wide handlebars are not really the go for this ride.<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Coming out at the bottom in Cornish St, we picked up the no 2 car and went and got the first car and trailer from Stratton St. Stauncher riders who didn\u2019t want to use two cars could either ride up through Belmont on the road, or ride up both Korokoro and Baked Beans, and then back down again. Just up from Baked Beans turnoff is the Korokoro dam, which is also worth a look for scenic action. Watch out for walkers !<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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MARCH 1993<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Newsletter #2<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

A DISCLAIMER – Everything in this newsletter has been submitted to us by anonymous contributors. We at Cycle Services do not encourage wild or irresponsible riding, or the reckless destruction of equipment. We also recommend that correct use of vocabulary should be strictly adhered to, to drink carrot juice, and to abstain from alcohol (and any other stimulants). We suspect that our anonymous contributors are not really mountain bikers at all, but are actually undercover road posers attempting to infiltrate and undermine the serious sport of mountain biking.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

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TECH TIPS \u2013 BRAKES<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

There is a saying that talent makes up for a lack of money, better than money makes up for a lack of talent. This especially applies to bicycles. Putting suspension forks on a bike won\u2019t make you a fast downhiller if your brakes are gutless. When it comes to going fast and still being in control, brakes are the # 1 hot item. <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s not that important what kind of brakes you have – any Shimano ones will do. If you have ones that say “Dia Compe”, or something like “Hsin Wah Fong”, you should burn them and get some Shimano ones. What\u2019s more important is the state of the brake pads and the way the brakes are set up.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Sadly, most brake pads wear out much faster off road than people expect. A four-hour ride in the mud can completely wear out a brand new pair of pads \u2013 e.g., riding once around the Karapoti in the rain can destroy your pads. What this means is that most mountain bikes have worn out pads. As a rough rule of thumb, they need to be replaces once half the brake pads have worn away. We have had a lot of bikes that have had the metal base of the pad rubbing on the rim causing the whole side of the rim to wear out and blow off. This is best avoided. Brake pads should be set up with around 2mm of toe in, to avoid squealing, and for maximum leverage, straddle wires at right angles to the brake arm \u2013 see diagram.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Recommended replacement brake pads include the Raleigh Shimano copies at around $6 a pair, and Aztec high performance pads at $17 a pair.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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THE WORD FROM CUBA STREET<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Hot Word Action From Cycle Services :<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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C.U.<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

(pronunciation varies from “see you” to “sioo”)<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Not going off, thrashed, wasted, useless, demoed, cheap, undesirable, not happening<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“Ever since my bike got run over by a bus, it\u2019s been totally C.U. “<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“Those \u2018Ferrano Mountain Pig\u2019 mountain bikes from The Warehouse are just C.U. “<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Can also be used for people: “Mr C.U. is a tosser” or as a replacement for “See you later” etc<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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Shralving<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Going out on the edge, riding to the limit, loose going off high speed action, going fast without crashing<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“All the tossers crashed on the downhill, but Team Nihilist was shralving”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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From hell<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

An extra good example of whatever is being discussed \u2013 makes going off stuff better, and C.U. stuff worse.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“There goes a C.U. bogan tosser from hell” \u2013 very derogatory<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“John Tomac is a hot. Shralving, going off, hardcore action thrasher from hell” \u2013 very complimentary<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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The business<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Getting on with the vital act \u2013 riding a 10 foot vert, blasting down The Elevator, doing what everybody else is standing around looking at and waiting for somebody else to do.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

“Let\u2019s do the business”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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Geoff Marsland from Havana Coffee likes to do the business in our doorway<\/strong> <\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

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PRODUCT REVIEW<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Leppin Squeezy. Long Chain Carbohydrate Polymer, known as wallpaper paste or elephant spoof. One of the little squeezy sachets contains roughly half the energy of a power bar, and takes only a fraction of the time to eat. They look gross, but they do the business and at $1.30 each they are cheaper than eating energy bars. Don\u2019t be put off by the fact that they don\u2019t resemble food \u2013 it\u2019s more like eating flavoured elephant spoof. So don\u2019t BONK \u2013 raise your intramuscular glycogen levels with enzymatic partial hydrolysate of maize starch! Available in lemon\/lime, vanilla and peach flavours.
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RIDER PROFILE – VIRGIL <\/span><\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Name<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nAdrian \u2018N\u2019<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Nickname<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nVirgil<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Age<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n22<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Suburb<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nKhandallah<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Occupation<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nJim Bolger MTB Team\/Painter\/Student<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Bike<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nMarin<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Components<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nXT Shimano, Mavic, Mt Zefal, Panaracer, Specialized, Giant<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Extras<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nSony Walkman, Revo Sunglasses, pump, bottles, Hacky sac, lots of tools, a pipe <\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Most awesome ride\/race<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nDefinitely The Elevator, Ngamu Forest, Hawkins Hill, Mt Kau Kau<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Other favourite rides<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nTinakori Hill, Wrights Hill, Johnsons. Anywhere roadie can\u2019t go, verts, high speed, Bot gardens heinous track<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite food<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nTons of pasta, potatoes, steak, steak, steak, Chinese (not seedy takeaways), Jack Daniels in any shape or form, cake, pizza, salad, mostly anything that\u2019s not moving<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite music<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nCult, Soundgarden, Led Zeppelin, Hallelujah Picassos, Linton Kwesi Johnson, MC\u00a0 900ft Jesus, Jane\u2019s Addiction; whatever\u2019s playing when you\u2019re partying hard, it doesn\u2019t matter<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite films<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nLiquid Sky, Apocalypse Now, Withnail & I, Surfing vids, The Good The Bad and the Ugly, My Own Private Idaho<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite books\/mags<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nJoseph Conrad, L Ron Hubbard, Tolkien, Asimov, Surfer, MTB Mags, Dr Hunter S Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Raymond E Feist, July 1992 Penthouse<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Ambitions\/aspirations<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nTo remember an entire night when with Nihilists, Henry, Oli & Wheels ! Stop hitting moving cars, get out of overdraft, no bimbos !<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Hot comment action<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nExtreme, life\u2019s too short not to be<\/strong><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

If you can, you will; Team NihilistTerminal velocityThe body is evil, it shall be punished<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t forget your zigzags ! <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

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HELLRIDE OF THE MONTH <\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Picture this, a heavy night and an earlyish morning rise to go riding with nine other guys hell bent on being first up and down everything that resembled a hill. Well, it turns out that the evening before was a little heavier than everyone thought. Grovelling home from the hours of a measly 9pm for Wheels who was racing on Sunday, to grand effort of 3.30am for Steve F (the hardest man on earth). A few quiets out the back of C.S. led us to Magpie Lawn where we to liaise with Johnny, Oli (really a roadie, but generally a humourous kinda chap) and Wheels, an observer extremist almost voyeuristic who loves to kick back and chill.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

2pm Saturday afternoon, an appalling game of Hacky with motivation at sub-zero level, riding great distances was not looking good. What, no gut bashing ride, what\u2019s that I hear you say, “Softcocks !” Well, you see, attempting to play tag at high speed on a mountain bike is not easy, especially when endo\u2019s, dabbing and full on over the handle bars is an every second possibility. There was one vicious single track come vert that was attempted several times by only five of the boys. Steve F put out the challenge, with Brendan going over the bars and almost off a ten-foot drop. Johnny put in a fine attempt face planting at everyone\u2019s feet \u2013 classic stuff. Luckily no serious damage, apart from ego and a little blood.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Bike tag resumed, until Steve F snapped his handlebar stem, yeah his handlebar stem. He claimed Hellman status, while everyone decided on closer inspection that the only part of the hardest man on earth was what he was holding in his hand ! Oliver Twist, think laterally fine readers, bled the most, how typical of a roadie. The unfortunate thing was he gained the most sympathy on a typical roadie pose ride back through town to C.S. It would seem that Midnight was almost closed until ten cups and saucers mysteriously disappeared, it seems that their daily take had almost doubled. And that was that, nothing mind bogglingly heinous, just another typical ride in the day and the life of a mountain biker. <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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MAY 1993<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Newsletter #3<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

What do you guys do with these newsletters ? Is this some kind of cult ? With groupies hanging out for the next newsletter and getting stressed out because April is late, we can only conclude that punters are hanging out to find out how to GO OFF \u2026 Sorry it\u2019s late. Lateness is really seventies, man. CU lateness. April never existed. This is the May newsletter. And it\u2019s early. Because here at Cycle Services we say “Why put off to today, what you can do yesterday” <\/span><\/p>\n

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TECH TIP<\/strong><\/span><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

SADDLES<\/strong> : There is such a proliferation of bizarre saddle angles that we feel compelled to draw attention to a basic principle of saddles\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

*** FLAT ***<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

As in level, not sticking upwards or downwards. One of those things with a bubble floating in the middle may be useful to check this.Why ? 1. Greg Lemond says so2. Weight distributionA downwards sloping saddle puts extra weight on the wrists and arms, and forces weight onto the front wheel, making the bike heavy and sluggish.An upward saddle puts pressure on the groin (CU !) and leaves the front wheel too light, ready for front end washouts.<\/span><\/p>\n

Yes, it\u2019s true that some people can\u2019t handle having their seats flat, and always need it sloping down at the front. This is because they are physically deformed\u2026 But otherwise, if you can handle a flat saddle, then Greg Lemond and other notable famous punters, ALL agree that you should LEVEL OUT.<\/span><\/p>\n

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THE WORD FROM CUBA STREET<\/strong><\/span><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

Hot word action from Cycle Services:<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
TOASTED<\/span><\/td>\nToast is all about soft white fluffy stuff getting burnt<\/span>How to learn about TOASTED<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Method A<\/span><\/td>\n\n
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  1. Ride off knarly vertFreak out half way downApply front brake hard<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. Wait <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Method B<\/span><\/td>\n\n
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  1. Get right off the back of the saddle on a steep downhillTake feet out of pedals and straddle rear tyrePress crotch in space between tyre and frame<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. Scream<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
STONERS<\/span><\/td>\nHow to spot a stoner. Telltale signs:<\/span><\/p>\n
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  1. The guy turning back 50 metres into a race because he forgot his lighter. (Why does he want a lighter in a race ?)Anyone with Team Green written in their sponsorship column. What does Team Green mean ? Sounds a bit dodgy, doesn\u2019t it ? Kawasaki ? Not\u2026<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. Anyone in Cycle Services. Why is the shop painted green ? Looks a bit dodgy, doesn\u2019t it ? Why is this newsletter green ? Is this paper made from recycled herbal foliage ?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
BOGANS<\/span><\/td>\nKey words:<\/span>Holden. Hutt. Lion. Heavy Metal. Sheet metal. V8. Keg. Ford. DB. Black Sabbath. Headbang. Chevvy. AC\/DC. Bullbars, leather, Jim Morrison. Black jersey. Flagon. Petrol. SCORE 1 for each item10 or more \u2013 REAL bogan5 to 10 \u2013 try hard boganLess than 5 – CU no go bogan<\/span><\/p>\n

0 \u2013 may not be any type of bogan<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

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RIDER PROFILE<\/strong> <\/u>\u2013 This month\u2019s SPECIAL: Two for the price of one, and they\u2019re both zany wild men groovers\u2026.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Name<\/span><\/td>\nStevo the Devo<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Nickname<\/span><\/td>\nGollum<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Suburb <\/span><\/td>\nKelburn<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Age<\/span><\/td>\n23<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Occupation<\/span><\/td>\nStoodent<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Bike<\/span><\/td>\nDiamond<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Components<\/span><\/td>\nShimano etc<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Extras<\/span><\/td>\nMavic, Ambrosio rims, Bear Traps<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Most awesome ride\/race<\/span><\/td>\nHawkins, Karapoti<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Other favourite rides<\/span><\/td>\nRollercoaster, Johnson\u2019s short track<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Food<\/span><\/td>\nPasta, animal, mud<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Music<\/span><\/td>\nAnything that\u2019s very very fast, Metallica, Ministry, Soundgarden, Nurse, etc <\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Films<\/span><\/td>\nTo live and die in LA, The cook the thief, Bambi<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Books\/Mags<\/span><\/td>\nHitchhikers guide, Lord of the rings. Clockwork Orange, Slaine<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Ambitions\/Aspirations<\/span><\/td>\nTo escape the clutches of Lilith, To outwit all the bogans<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Hot Comment Action<\/span><\/td>\nLook out bogan, What red light<\/span>If you can you will, Shit happens in threes<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

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Name<\/span><\/td>\nBen Kepes<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Nickname<\/span><\/td>\nBeano, Keepsie, Doolally Alley<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Suburb<\/span><\/td>\nTawa<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Age<\/span><\/td>\n21<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Occupation<\/span><\/td>\nElectrician<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Bike<\/span><\/td>\nRaleigh<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Components<\/span><\/td>\nShimano, Selle Italia, Mavic<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Extras<\/span><\/td>\nPulse Rate Monitor<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Most awesome ride\/race<\/span><\/td>\nA 1st<\/sup> and 2nd<\/sup> for Team Cycle Services in the Taranaki Pro\/Am Road Race, Shitting Twinkies down the Elevator <\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Other favourite rides<\/span><\/td>\nPaekakariki Hill (The steep side), From Cycle Services to McDonalds<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Food<\/span><\/td>\nMcDonalds, Helga\u2019s chips<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Music<\/span><\/td>\nJesus Jones (Goes off ! for time trialling)<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Films<\/span><\/td>\nAmerican Fliers (of course), Tour de France videos<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Favourite Books\/Mags<\/span><\/td>\nBicycle Guide, Greg Lemond\u2019s complete book of cycling, Karma Sutra, Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Ambitions\/Aspirations<\/span><\/td>\nTo ride the Elevator (ha ha !!), To get Wheels to dig road riding again<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Hot Comment<\/span><\/td>\nNot all roadies are CU tossers from hell (but quite a few are)<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

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HOT RACE ACTION<\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

NZMBA National Cross Country Finals \u2013 PALMERSTON NORTH This race was HOT. Even driving up was exciting, as we pulled off the steep, narrow gravel road up to the start, to let crazed HELLMAN Darryn Henderson past in his big grunty ute. Next thing we saw was wild sideways powerslides, and a trail of the most impressive four wheel skid marks since the Wellington waterfront the day after the Nissan 500.Lining up at the start with all the awesome riders going off, and right from the outset Team Cycle Service was in the hunt for publicity as we etched the new purple riding jerseys into the collective psyche of the mountain bike fraternity.Firstly Steve Butland set the standard with a wild cartwheel and spectacular crash right in the middle of the bunch, Then Dave Newbury overtook twenty riders into the first corner doing a manic crossed up motorcross slide, only to crash his brains out and go straight back to the tail end place.The weather was perfect, and the track was a beautifully tortuous figure eight that took in steep hill climbs, rolling four wheel drive tracks and grass, rough downhills, mud, river crossings, wild fast downhills, technical single track and gravel roads. What else is there ? (Apart from carrying, and who needs that ?) In the space of just minutes it was possible to go from a wrist busting adrenaline frenzy mega descent overtaking riders like a fighter plane dropping out of the sky to blitz unsuspecting slow things, and then switch to being all alone, lost in a silent single forest track, a paranoid search for tyre tracks (the arrow did point up here, didn\u2019t it ?)<\/span><\/p>\n

So it went off, and I haven\u2019t got a clue who came where, but everybody was racing hard, and after the Karapoti this may well be one of NZ\u2019s most epic races. Sam McMurray and Yvette Southorn both rode strongly in the Expert classes, and the rest of us cruised around with all the other slow plebs in the Sports class. (As a new sideline to pass the time while cruising with the other Sport riders \u2013 if you\u2019re sick of watching the grass grow \u2013 play count the over $5000 bikes. There\u2019s enough titanium at the back end of the Sport grade to keep a NASA space shuttle going off..) <\/span><\/p>\n

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JUNE 1993<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Newsletter #4<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

OK Punters, don\u2019t freak, here it is, newsletter No 4. In this, our biggest issue ever, we have all the info from in the trade, and more going off dribble for all you ravers. So whether you\u2019re a trihead weight freak poser looking to get munted on a death vert, or a hardcore hellman thrasher, coned up and out for air on a pigbike, hang in with this months word action and your form will be good.<\/span><\/p>\n

Anyone who is attempting to become a hell-thrasher, would do well to study the form of Craig “My bike\u2019s broken again” Nihilist Anderson. After a full $700 parts replacement programme (we threw money at the problem till it went away), he lined up at Waiterere Beach for the final KOF race, and managed an awesome three kilometres before a twig demolished his brand new derailleur (see next item). After yet another replacement derailleur was “heinously twisted beyond recognition” after only four days, by yet another twig, we are starting to wonder if his bike is cursed\u2026. Anyone who can set a running average of $100 broken parts per week, and stick to it month after month, has got to wonder. <\/span><\/p>\n

Anyone who is attempting to become the most hopelessly lost dude in a race, would do well to study the for of Craig “has anyone seen an angry ropehead” Nihilist Anderson. While walking back to the start of the Waiterere Beach race with a broken derailleur (see previous item), he met a helpful TOSSER who directed him on a “shortcut” back to the start. Four hours later, after a very, very long walk following a disoriented circular path taking in much of the forest\u2019s fascinating flora and scenery, he arrived back at the start. As the prize giving was over, the people had left, and there was hardly anyone left to abuse, Craig had to vent his anger by flinging his bike into a fence until some more parts bent.<\/span><\/p>\n

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PHOTO COMPETITION<\/span><\/p>\n

Local celebrity FAMOUS HENRY, seen here going off in CITY VOICE<\/span><\/p>\n

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Can you think of a better caption for the photo? Best caption wins a 2nd hand puncture repair kit<\/span>.<\/p>\n

Are you artistic? Best coloured photo wins a months supply of bent wheels, from our private collection.<\/p>\n

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TECH TIPS<\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

Chains<\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

If you ride off road in winter, your chain is going to get trashed. There is only one way to avoid this, and that\u2019s not to ride. Personally, I\u2019m no expert on getting a good run out of chains \u2013 my last chain and 36T chainring were worn out in six weeks. But people who do ride and still get over 6 months out of their chains and cluster have shared their secrets with me. <\/span><\/p>\n

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  1. \n
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    1. Clean the chain after every off road ride. Kerosene is the best solvent to use because it leaves an oily film on the chain. <\/span> <\/strong><\/li>\n
    2. Leave the chain on the bike. Disconnecting the chain and taking it off to soak is likely to lead to pin failure later \u2013 especially with Shimano chains. If you like taking the chain off, get a Taya chain, with the special connecting link. <\/span><\/strong><\/li>\n
    3. For convenience, get a chain cleaning tool, with whizzy little revolving brushes that scrub the chain clean while you backpedal the chain round by hand.<\/span><\/strong><\/li>\n
    4. Wipe the kero off with a rag, and then lube the chain. No lubricant is perfect. CRC is fast and convenient, OK for dry conditions, but washes off in water, and has to be reapplied every ride because it dries out. Thick oils like engine oil and chainsaw oil just suck because they attract dirt and wear out the chain faster. Thin oils like sewing machine oil are good value for money. But they tend to come off in wet conditions. Trendy synthetic oils like Pedro\u2019s are best because they stay on longest. <\/span><\/strong><\/li>\n
    5. If you have problems with Shimano hyperglide chains breaking, try using a Taya, or a DID Supershift chain, as both of these chains are better able to handle hard crunching gear changes. <\/span><\/strong><\/li>\n
    6. If your chain slips under pressure, chances are your cluster and\/or chainring(s) are C.U. For the first few rides after your expensive parts replacement programme, you will probably be motivated to maintain your chain. See step 1.<\/span><\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/div>\n
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      WORD ACTION<\/strong><\/u><\/span><\/p>\n

      Types of Cyclists \u2013 A Questionnaire.<\/span><\/p>\n

      TRIHEAD<\/strong> : 1. You like to ride in wet undies<\/span><\/p>\n

      2. You prefer fluoro undies <\/span><\/p>\n

      3. You prefer fluoro everything <\/span><\/p>\n

      4. Aerobars<\/span><\/p>\n

      5. Training schedule <\/span><\/p>\n

      POSERS <\/strong>: 1. You sleep with your bike<\/span><\/p>\n

      2. Your mother polishes your bike every day<\/span><\/p>\n

      3. Matching team jersey and shorts<\/span><\/p>\n

      4. Road bike<\/span><\/p>\n

      5. Oriental Bay<\/span><\/p>\n

      HELLMEN<\/strong> : 1. You like to crash into trees<\/span><\/p>\n

      2. You never ride straight<\/span><\/p>\n

      3. Hangover and lots of drugs make you go faster<\/span><\/p>\n

      4. Thrashed mountain bike<\/span><\/p>\n

      5. Cycle Services regular<\/span><\/p>\n

      SCORE<\/strong> : 5 \u2013 Typical. Your life is a clich\u00e9.<\/span><\/p>\n

      4 \u2013 Not all there. Missing the important element.<\/span><\/p>\n

      3 \u2013 Mixed up. You don\u2019t know what you are, do you ?<\/span><\/p>\n

      2 \u2013 Learner. Tosser. Get a life.<\/span><\/p>\n

      1 \u2013 Pathetic. Can\u2019t you even buy some fluoro undies ?<\/span><\/p>\n

      0 \u2013 Nothing. You don\u2019t amount to anything.<\/span><\/p>\n

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      <\/a><\/strong><\/span>RIDER PROFILE<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/u><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
      Name<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nAl<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Nickname<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nMaco<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Suburb<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nVount Mic<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Age <\/span><\/span><\/td>\n19<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Occupation<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nTech \u2013 Weld\/Fitting, Turning<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Bike<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nCadex, tie dyed Healing Clipper, unicycle with detached front wheel<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Components<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nBar ends, XT (ish), pump<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Extras<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nMud, blood and attitude<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Most awesome ride\/race<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nHawkins Hill \u2013 coke crunchies and hangover, final air before beach is good.<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Other Favourites<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n\n
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      1. Johnson\u2019s, Cuba Mall slide humps, nude motorcycling. James Smiths spiral<\/span><\/li>\n
      2. Climies downhill, Magpie lawn, bus surfing, Frank Kitts slide, Mt Maria, Plimmers Steps <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Favourite Food<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nPasta, pies, peanuts, power bars, chips and Go Cat<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Favourite Music<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nNana Mouskouri\u2019s greatest hits, Sesame St theme<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Favourite Films<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nTerminator, Smurfs, Reamed and Limpy<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Favourite Reading<\/span><\/span><\/td>\nWeetbix packet, Furry Freak brothers, Ramones record covers, Footrot Flats<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Ambitions\/Aspirations<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n\n
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      • To be Cycle Services “93 Unisanta<\/span><\/li>\n
      • To have external clearance from top tube<\/span><\/li>\n
      • To outsprint the Feds<\/span><\/li>\n
      • To tame my pet python<\/span><\/li>\n
      • To leave tyre marks on a plate glass window<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
      Hot Comment Action<\/span><\/span><\/td>\n\n