Cycle Services Newsletters Index

The original Cycle Services Newsletters are all still online

(All the links below will take you to the original CS Newsletters on the CS website)

November 2000
One last CS Newsletter for the fans

September 1999
Consume a substantial portion of roasted meat

July 1999
Try eating your own hand, and get wired punk…

March 1999
Give all your money to Cycle Services

November 1998
10 dozen beers and some other products

August 1998
The world’s sexiest cyclists on drugs

September 1997
Paranoid speed freaks who ride downhill with drugs

April 1997
Eating chewy bars in spacesuits

November 1996
“Do not under any circumspection product regular issues“

July 1996
“release your sphincter muscles and ride like a psycho hosebeast”

March 1996
“an inflatable sheep, a blow up woman and a shop dummy”

December 1995
“Dubious conversation, adventure & mannerisms”

August 1995
“Bogus cheesie Heidi types no problem”

April 1995
“John  Tomac’s dog said so”

December 1994
“Bogus beyond the call of usual standards of bogusness“

September 1994
“I don’t need one, mate, I’ve got an afro!”

July 1994
“The saddest piece of journalistic cyclogarbage”

May 1994
“Just a bogus tosshead with a sphincter fetish”

March 1994
“Skillfully manipulate the seat into dragster position”

December 1993
“Santa gets his frottage here!”

October 1993
“These feelings are really heavy, man!”

September 1993
“Extensive testing on wasted university students”

August 1993
“Smoke pouring out of all the windows”

June 1993
“Nothing. You don’t amount to anything”

May 1993
“Press crotch into space between tyre and frame”

March 1993
“Anywhere roadies can’t go”

February 1993
Issue 1 – First ever CS newsletter!

Newsletter Subject Index (1993–2000)

Tech Tips

Brakes – March 1993
Saddles – May 1993
Chains – June 1993
Handgrips – August 1993
Wheels – March 1994
Tyres – May 1994
Downhilling – July 1994
Seat Height – September 1994
95 Shimano – December 1994
How many inches in a mm? – April 1995
Brake Pad Replacement – August 1995
Gear Ratios – December 1995
How to be a roadie – March 1996
Full Suspension Bikes – July 1996
Pro Teams Equipment – November 1996
Five all-time suspension fork classics – April 1997
CS clothing – August 1998
Why 9 speed sucks – September 1999

New products and Product Reviews

Leppin squeezies – March 1993
9 Lists of 10 things you never needed to know – July 1994
New Stuff for 95 – Hot Picks & Lemons – September 1994
Product News – April 1995
Hot new things – December 1995
Eating without food – April 1997
Cactus brochure – November 1998
Ahead lighting systems – July 1999

Rides

Hellride of the Month – Belmont Trig – February 1993
Hellride of the Month – Bike tag – March 1993
Hellride of the Month – Rallywoods – June 1993
Carpark Thrashing for the Winter months – August 1993
Hellride of the Month – Johnson’s track – September 1993
Sex in the Moonlight – October 1993
Hellride of the Month – Karipoti – July 1994

Races

National XC Finals – May 1993
Hellride of the Month – Ngamu Forest – October 1993
Bugle Broadcasts (Strictly Downhill) – March 1994
The Karapoti Classic – May 1994
Wanganui Downhill – December 1994
Karipoti 95 – April 1995
Hardcore Road Race – December 1995
Hellride of the Year – Mt Fyffe – December 1995
World Champs Downhill – November 1996

Rider Profiles & Pics

Bugle – February 1993
Virgil – March 1993
Steve F – May 1993
Ben Kepes – May 1993
Alastair McIntyre – June 1993
Oli – August 1993
Bronson – September 1993
Spooks – October 1993
Rod Bardsley – December 1993
Wheels – March 1994
Fraser Wright – May 1994
Jo Dale – July 1994
Evan Freshwater – September 1994
Bike shop Bikes – Wheels – September 1997
Rico Implants – August 1998
More about Rico – November 1998
Sam Raphael – March 1999
Where’s JK? – March 1999
Pip wins! – March 1999
Gordy – March 1999
Kirky “Van Damme” – March 1999
Bugle’s 12″ travel neck – July 1999
Barnie the Xerox killer – July 1999
Grommits – July 1999
Aaron eats hand – July 1999
Rod Teletubbies – September 1999
More Grommits – September 1999
BJ No Feet – September 1999
Guido the Donkey Boy – November 2000

News

Makara Peak – August 1998
Top Shop nomination – November 1998
Cyberfrot website – November 1998
Bike Industry Goss – July 1999
Roadworks – November 2000

Words

The Word from Cuba St – February 1993
The Word from Cuba St – March 1993
The Word from Cuba St – May 1993
Word Action – Types of Cyclists – June 1993
Book review – Nihilist handbook – December 1993
Dave Dirty Oven’s Palindromes – August 1995
CS Top 50 Marginal Hell Words – March 1996
Roadies Can Speak – July 1996
Down with the kids – November 2000

Poems

Literary Corner – Hellman – June 1993
Poet’s Corner – Bronson & Luciano – May 1994
CS Haikus – March 1999

Ravings

Hang 5 – August 1993
Hot 5 – August 1993
News & updates – August 1993
Gossip – September 1993
Hooliganism – September 1993
Sounds – October 1993
DJ picks – October 1993
Bronson Speaks – October 1993
Bronson on couriers – December 1993
Extreme Bicycles – September 1994
Sachet Rash – April 1997
The new techno era in newsletters – September 1997
Slow Down You Freaks – September 1997
Sexiest cyclists – August 1998
Tour de drugs – August 1998
Last newsletter – November 2000
Creating newsletters in a freak void – November 2000

Satire

Guano bars – September 1993
Health tips – Are you at risk from SIDS? – September 1993
Book review – Nihilist handbook – December 1993
Handy hints – How to copy our newsletter – May 1994
Mirkin Award – September 1994
SRP Advert – September 1994
Off Road Test – Yodaka Grizzly SLC – April 1995
Personal Introductions Column – August 1995
Reader Survey – July 1996
25 Reasons why Bicycles are Better Than Women – July 1996
TUCK TIPS #7 – Right yore own mag! – November 1996
New NZMBA rulings for the 1998 season – April 1997
Cinelli Spinachi Instructions – April 1997
Sock roks – August 1998
Spliff – August 1998

Letters

Letter of the month – Pete’s account – September 1994
Letterz to the Id – March 1996
Letter of the month – A. Nally – September 1997
Fan mail from Xerox – September 1999

Stories

Cartoons

The Greatest Story Ever Told – September 1994
The Paranoid Cycle Courier – August 1995
The Outhouse – December 1995
Michelin Man – December 1995
Bungle’s Muffins – April 1995
Training with Dr A. Nal – March 1996
10 Downhiller Tips – July 1996
97 Pro Contracts – November 1996
8″ Travel – November 1996
Sock Roks – November 1996

Competitions

Creative Writing competition – March 1994
Creative Writing winners – May 1994
Competition #407 – July 1994
Name the ex-CS sifter 1 – March 1999
Name the ex-CS sifter 2 – November 2000

Crosswords

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